Lawyer Mama

Christmas Card Outtakes

Because life isn't always a perfect picture and we wouldn't want it to be. Sometimes the outtakes are the best part!

The True Holiday Spirit

On NPR's annual Tinsel Tales today, I heard a Modern Day Mary & Joseph by Scott Simon.  It was clever and heartwarming, of course, but it struck a deeper chord with me when I heard Simon's version of how "Joseph" comes to understand what this little baby, "Jesus," means:

"I think I finally understand," he said.  "Why we're here.  Why we've been given the gift of this child. 

"It doesn't matter who the father is, does it?  Every child born cries for our love and deserves our care. Every child who's hungry in Sudan or Louisiana or Indonesia.  Every little girl who's abandoned by the roadside in China. Every little boy in Uganda who's dragged into somebody's army while he's still not as tall as the gun they put in his arms. Every teenager who never seems to take off their ear buds.  Every little boy and girl anywhere who's threatened by a bomb, an epidemic, a bullet or a storm.  I must love them as a father loves his child."

Mary and Joseph sat with their arms around each other and around their baby boy. [...]  The star that had found them seemed to stay above them for a moment.  While their child breathed softly and safely and peacefully in their arms, looking out at a world that seemed suddenly new.

For me, this says it all.  I am not a religious person and I don't believe in God.  But what Joseph describes in the story is how many mothers and fathers begin to view the world after having a child.  It is a humbling reminder that our children aren't just ours.  They belong to the world.  They belong to all of us.  Whatever our differences, political and idealogical, each of us should do our part to ensure that all children everywhere are warm and safe and peaceful.

Happy Holidays.

Listen to Modern Day Mary and Joseph on NPR.

Cross posted on MOMocrats.

Cutest Reindeer Ever

I'm off to Harrisburg, Pennsylvania for the weekend visiting friends. Hollis wants it to snow so badly while we're up there, Mother Nature better make it happen! While I'm gone, I'll be regaling you with cuteness. I spent Thursday morning at Hollis's pre-school Christmas party and then we had a Mommy and Hollis afternoon. Of course, I took 5000 photos, but I'll only make you suffer through 10 or so over the weekend!

I give you the cutest reindeer ever:

That's Hollis with the football on the back of his red and blue sweater.

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Look what Emily nominated me for!



And apparently this nomination from Queen of the Mayhem from last year carried forward:



Go vote for me. Please???

Southern Snow

Here in the land of Dixie, we don't see much snow. At least not in our corner of Southeast Virginia. We live right on the coast, so the weather is just too mild for the white stuff, although we did get a couple sprinklings of night time snow last year. It's usually gone by 9 or 10 am.

Unfortunately, the kids have started to notice that they're missing out on some Winter fun here in Virginia. Last week in the car, Hollis decided to interrogate me about that white stuff he sees all over the Christmas specials on TV.

Hollis: "Mommy, you know my movie Toy Story? Not the one with the horse, the other one with Buzz?" (Never mind that Buzz is in both of them.) "Woody and Buzz got snow, right?"

Me: "Yes, sweetie, it does snow at the end of the movie. It's Christmas."

Hollis: "When Santa comes?"

Me: "Yes, sweetie."

Hollis: "In his sleighdd?"

He's not quite clear on exactly what a "sleigh" is yet. Right now it's all mixed up with sled. Understandable, I think.

Me: "Ummm hmmm."

Trying to figure out where this is going....

Hollis: "Where's our snow?"

Me: "Well, it's usually too warm to snow here, sweetie, but it might snow this year. We usually get a few sprinklings of snow every year."

Hollis: "Sprinkledings?"

Ooh, too complicated. Simplify, Steph, simplify.

Me: "Yes, sweets, we just get a little bit of snow that melts right away. But if it snows this year, I promise you can go out and play in it."

And then I immediately started praying to God that I wouldn't have to get up at 4am to let him play in some snow before it melts.

Hollis: "Santa lands in the snow. Right?"

Ooh, crap. Now I see where this is going.

Me: "Yes, babe, but he can also land just about anywhere."

Hollis: "Can he land in sand?"

Me: "Of course he can, sweetie."

Hollis: "OK."

I guess Hollis will have a white Christmas no matter what.

Southern Snow:




This is my first try at Painted Maypole's Monday Mission. This week the task was to get creative with photo shop. All of these photos were edited with Photo Shop and I added a "glow" to the photos. If you want to know how, just let me know.

'Tis The Season ... To Be Tacky

I have this rule about Christmas lights. There shall only be white lights on the outside of my home. We put colored lights on our tree and I certainly don't do a designer tree. I love all of the family ornaments and those we've collected over the year. Our Christmas tree is special. It's personal.

But in my yard there will be no inflatable Santa, no plastic nativity scene, no hodgepodge of lights causing seizures among the neighborhood children and sucking up enough energy to power Lichtenstein. This is pretty much Lawyer Mama's Third Commandment. It comes right after "Thou shalt put the toilet seat down" and "Thou shalt not pick your nose in public."

Why the edict on the lights? It's a slippery slope. It starts out as a harmless little lighted mechanical reindeer. Next thing you know, your yard looks like this:


I was flabbergasted when I saw this today. But then puzzled when I thought I spotted an ostrich in the plastic nativity scene. I may be a heathen, but I think I'd remember that from the Bible.


I made T drive around the other side of the house so I could check the ostrich out from a different angle.


Well, it's still tacky.

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Folks, today is Day 8 of the Stalking of Wil Wheaton. Alpha Dogma was kind enough to award me a BhD for my relentless stalking of Wil Wheaton. She even offered up some Wil eye candy for my perusal. Even if Wil never acknowledges my existence, at least I'll always have that. Thank you, my dear AD. Thank you.

I'm so putting that on my resume.

And now I'm passing the BhD on to Jenny from Mama Drama and The Blogess, the inspiration for my Wil stalking campaign. Jenny is so damn funny it's almost sad. In a funny way. Her Halloween post nearly gave me a stroke. Jenny excels at funny, but she also excels at the personal and she's a fantastic writer. Plus, she really gets me. I mean, she's semi-stalking Amy Sedaris and even wrote her a letter. With pictures. And gave it to her at BlogHer. Dude. I want to be Jenny when I grow up. Or don't grow up.

Seriously, what is with those Houston bloggers? They all seem to be amazing. Jenny, Julie, and Kyla are almost enough to make me move to Houston.

'Tis the Season ... of Rampant Consumerism

But H&H look awfully cute with Santa. How could I resist?

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It's Day 7 of my campaign to get Wil Wheaton to comment on my blog. Still no sign of him. I hope he's just coming down off the high of his appearance on NUMB3RS last night and will cave soon!