My Pantyhose Are Down Around My Ankles!

When I first started practicing law, I always obeyed the First Commandment of the female lawyer's dress code: Thou Shalt Always Wear Pantyhose In Court, even if it's 105 degrees outside. It made sense to me. Who wants to risk pissing off a crotchety old judge with antiquated views about women and decorum? Plus, a good foundation garment never hurt anyone, right? Right?

Ha! Tell that to someone who hasn't walked all over D.C. in a suit in the Summer. And crowded into a packed Metro car with somewhat, um, fragrant people. When it's 95 degrees. Oh and really friggin humid!

Still, for the first few years my panty hose were my support system, literally and figuratively. If I was scared to death going into a hearing, at least I knew I was wearing the right uniform. And fitting in is half the battle right? Right?

I think I finally got over that when I was pregnant with Hollis. I had a court hearing in June in D.C. I struggled into my maternity underwear, fought the D.C. traffic, and then hiked half a mile to the courthouse in 95 degree weather.

On the way there I noticed I was having a bit of a problem. My maternity pantyhose were slowly rolling down my body from the waist. I kept grabbing them and hiking them back up, but it was futile. I barely made it through security and into the restroom before the hose was around my ankles. Boy, did I get some looks in that bathroom! Anyway, I had a great hearing, minus the required leg wear, and finally freed myself of the yoke of the foundation garment. You couldn't pay me enough to wear hose these days.

Even in court.

I'm such a rebel.

This post is part of the Parent Bloggers Network Blog Blast for Sk*rt, a new "social bookmarking" website for women. Our topic was "What Are You Hiding Under Your Skirt?" Clearly, it's not my pantyhose anymore!

Now I've already heard some digs about Sk*rt, some speculation that it's too girly and frivolous. But I see nothing wrong with reading about make-up, shoes, my weight, and world events. I mean, I can climb trees with the best of the boys, but I'm not going to do it in my new celery green peep toe wedges.

I can win a nifty prize if you go over to Sk*rt and vote for this post. I hate to pimp myself out, but I'll get over it!